Now let me tell you something about 1 of the great traditions that we have in our nice little civilization in the Netherlands. It’s called fireworks! How does it work? Well every last couple of days of each year many Dutch people buy fireworks and it gets really funny when they start lighting it!

And I am not talking about the beautiful fireworks with flames and sparks of many colors in the sky. No I am talking about loud BANGS.

The louder the better. Everybody does it! Everywhere! And they don’t just throw it somewhere, no they throw it at other people. Kids do it. Sometimes 10 years old. Often they let it explode in their hand, and by doing so, lose it.

When the Dutch bangs are not loud enough the Duch get them in Belgium. There they are even louder!

Sometimes the fireworks won’t go off and people check it out to see what’s wrong. Then when it goes off after all people sometimes lose their complete entire heads! Hilarious!

Just last week a son was filming that with his smartphone when that happened to his dad. RIP!

It is with this wonderful tradition that we in the Netherlands start every year with 800 completely new disabled people. Every hour someone gets blind.

But that’s not all. Entire houses burn down. But hey, if you can’t stand the heat get out of the kitchen.

One of the coolest things one can do with the loud bangs is fuck up animals. Like dogs and cats. This year people put a firecracker in a cat’s ass and lit it. The cat is now a (dead) bleeding octopus. Another guy threw a firecracker in the air and his dog went to catch it. He now owns a three-legged dog!

How great it is to live in a civilization with a superior culture, a proud history and good old traditions like these.